Cop Out

Younger readers may not be aware that Kevin Smith, the director – but not writer – of this Bruce Willis vehicle, was once considered the smartest, funniest player in American independent cinema. But that was a long time ago – he hasn't made anything approaching a good film for well over a decade, if you don't count the promo for Afroman's Because I Got High. Cop Out continues Smith's depressing, underwhelming run; Willis plays a cop who needs to sell his prized ultra-rare baseball card to pay for his daughter's wedding. It's stolen from him and ends up in some drug kingpin's memorabilia collection, resulting in Willis and partner having to bust some serious ass to try to get it back. Although Smith didn't write it, he might as well have: dick jokes, movie quotes, memorabilia worship – all his tics are present and correct. It's just not very funny – despite the all-too-apparent struggle to deliver verbal fireworks, there's something immovably sluggish and inert about it.