Real Madrid v Lyon – as it happened

Preamble: 26. It's the number of letters in the alphabet. And, as everyone knows, the number of sides in a rhombicuboctahedron. And the number of cantons in Switzerland and the number of Oscars won by Walt Disney and, yes, the number of times that the number 18 is used in the Bible. Frothing numerologist bozos insist 26 is magic. But the reason we mention it here tonight is, of course, that in the history of the European Cup/Champions League, teams that drew the first leg 1-1 at home progressed to the next round in only 26% of ties. So that gives you some idea of the task facing Lyon tonight. Except it doesn't really, does it? The previous 568 times that European teams have drawn 1-1 at home in the tournament has no bearing whatsoever on tonight's match. I don't even know why I mentioned that 26% stat really. Suppose it just beat bringing up 74, which is an altogether more boring number, you must agree. So now then, here are some things that really are significant: 1) Cristiano Ronaldo is fit to start for Real, meaning the awesome quartet of Di Maria, Ozil, Ronaldo and Benzema shall be in full effect. 2) Lisandro, who missed the first leg, is back for Lyon. He will play at centre-forward and torment Madrid's defenders during Lyon's rare attacks, though those attacks won't be so rare as we may anticipate if Yoann Gourcouff, who has been chosen ahead of Miralem Pjanic, brings his A game. 3) Lyon president Jean-Michel Aulas is no doubt right now claiming to have psyched out Jose Mourinho. What Lyon absolutely didn't want, given that they must score tonight, was for Real to simply sit back and play for the 0-0 that would put them through on away goals. So Aulas spent all day yesterday taunting Mourinho, saying he was certain to go all-out defence because that's the type of manager he is. His aim was to provoke Mourinho into trying to prove him wrong by selecting an attacking line-up and going gung-ho so as to leave space for Lyon to exploit (behind Ramos was their most fruitful avenue of attack in the first leg). The fact that Mourinho has plumped for the buccaneering Marcelo ahead of the slightly more conservative Arbeloa at left-back is probably enough to convince Aulas that he has got his wish. But that is bunkum too, isn't it? Real were never going to play for a 0-0 at home to a team lying third in Ligue 1. Teams: Real: Casillas; Sergio Ramos, Pepe, Carvahlo, Marcelo; Xabi Alonso, Khedira; Di Maria, Ozil, Ronaldo; Benzema Subs: Adan, Diarra, Granero, Canales, Arbeloa, Albiol, Adebayor Lyon: Lloris; Reveillere, Cris, Lovren, Cissokho; Toulalan, Kallstrom, Gourcuff; Delgado, Lisandro, Briand Subs: Vercoutre, Diakhate, Pjanic, Kolodziejczak, Gomis, Gonalons, Pied Ref: Damir Skomina (SVN) Predictions: "I think the score will be 2-2 tonight!" bawls Loig Thivend, offering no explanation whatsoever. Similarly, I'm saying 3-1 to Real, with Benzema bagging at least two. 7:42pm: Michel Salgado, ensconced in the Sky studio, says: "we have to get to the quarter-final, this is a massive match for us." Who knew Blackburn were in the Champions League? 7:43pm: Out waddle the teams. Gourcuff smiling brightly, which may be a good sign, and Toulalan looking a lot like Dr Wilson from the show House, as usual. 1 min: We have kick-off. "Is it also significant that 26 is the number of Jose Mourinho's former captain, Mighty John Terry?" spews Lou Roper, suggesting yet again that those wacky numerologists were wrong about it being in any way associated with magic. 2 min: Certainly no sign of Real playing for a 0-0. They've started at rip-roaring speed and nearlay sliced Lyon open following a superb one-two twixt Benzema and Ronaldo. But the former's subsequent pass for Ozil was cut out by Cris. 3 min: Ronaldo blems a 30-yard freekick towards the home of Atletico Madrid. 4 min: Real are rampant! Marcelo hurtles forward down the left and then slips a canny ball through to Ozil. Lloris hares off his line to divert it away but Ozil hooks it back into the danger zone, whereupon Toulalan nods away ... but only as far as Marcelo, who cracks low shot towards goals, forcing a fine save from Lloris. 6 min: Lyon threaten for the first time, as Cissokho bounds down the left and delivers a fine centre that narrowly eludes Delgado. Moments later Lisandro curls a decent cross towards the back post but Briand can't connect. 8 min: Lovely interplay between Di Maria and Benzema before the latter fires in a low cross. Reveillere bashes it away in extremis. 9 min: Pepe deservedly booked for cynically blocking Gourcuff as Lyon tried to launch a counter-attack. 11 min: Shoddiness from Cissokho, who gives the ball away at the rim of his own box. Shoddiness from Benzema, who fails to punish the defender as he over-hits an attempted through-ball. 12 min: Lyon win their first corner of the game, unless they got another one that I've already forgotten about. Gourcuff delivers, Ramos does splendidly to clear under pressure from two attackers. 14 min: Cissokho rollicks down the left and swings a decent cross out to the edge of the box, where Lisandro meets it on the volley. If he's lucky he may be able to collect the ball later as the bus winds its way back to France. "My bosses here at work have launched a new offensive against time wasting and now all of my favourite websites including the Guardian are blocked on our computers," whimpers Chris Nemeh, who works for no-good fools. "The good news is one of my ex co-workers (fired for lack of productivity) anticipated this and came up with a code to get around the firewall so I can still read your MBMs. If I can stick it to The Man I'm sure Lyon can do the same." 17 min: Xabi Alonso curls a freekick in from wide on the left. Ronaldo leaps 14 yards out, beating Cris to the ball and sending a decent header towards goal. Lloris holds it well. 19 min: Pepe soars high to nut the ball clear. In the process of jumping he kneed Lisandro in the face. It was entirely accidentally but many refs would have brandished at least a yellow card for that, in which case Pepe would been off. 21 min: This is by no means one-way traffic. Lyon have looked pretty nifty going forward and, after a torrid opening, have mostly kept Real at bay. And they jsut forged their best chance of the game. Cissokho, again running in behind Ramos as per the first leg, hurtled down the wing and then pulled a clever ball back to Delgado, who had peeled off to the edge of the box. he took one touch and then tried to place a low curler in at the far post. Casilaas pushes it out for a corner. "Surely all these mind-games are a complete nonsense?" barks John McLauchlin. "I imagine, for the most part, players and managers really don't give a rat's posterior about what the media and/or the opposition says. Why would someone making millions of dollars a year spend any of their time reading new-papers and the like? I reckon they just show up for these pressers, trot out a few lines (which the media and fans interpret to create some semblance of a storyline) and then go off to their posh villas to bathe in a champagne-filled Jacuzzi." 23 min: Marcelo somehow avoids a booking for chopping down Briand. 25 min: Lyon are not merely enjoying a lot of possession at the moment, they're pulling Real's defence hither and thither. Reveillere joined in a moment ago, providing an overlap down the right before pinging in a cross that Carvahlo diverted out for a corner. 27 min: A Real counter-attack begins with a long diagonal ball towards Ronaldo on the left. He takes it down, cuts inside and unleashes a ferocious swirler. Lloris parries well. 29 min: Great tackle by Lovren to crunch Di Maria is perfectly legitimate and brutal fashion. That put an end to a wonderful Real build-up. 31 min: Carvahlo booked for yet another cynical foul on a Madrid player. Many times where Lyon try to mount a counter-attack it is snuffed out early doors by a bad tackle. "Toulalan might have a bit of the Wilsons about him, but I wonder if House himself could identify the neurological disorder which has caused the commentator Rob Palmer to exclaim "Toulalan!" every time Gourcuff is on the ball since the first minute of the first leg?" cracks Dominic Cavlan. 33 min: Tremendous tackle by Cris to thwart Benzema after another fine Madrid move. This is a very quality game and nicely poised, to boot. GOAL! Real 1-0 Lyon (Marcelo 37') A devastating move and sumptuous finish! The Brazilian tore forward from the back, swapped slick passes with Ronaldo and then twisted and turned past two defenders anmd smashed the ball into the net from 16 yards. Lloris got a hand to it but couldn't keep it out. 38 min: Gourcuff for leaning into Carvahlo as the Portuguese jumped to head clear, causing him to fall with a mean thud to the ground. 39 min: Delgado hangs a decent cross up to the back post. Briang jumps well to get his head to it but can't direct it on target. And, in fact, the ref doesn't agree that he jumped well, instead awarding Real a freekick for pushing by Briand. 41 min: Another top save from Lloris following yet more excellent play by Marceloa, who roared down the left and fed Ozil, who pulled it back for Benzema. Bang! But Lloris flies through the air to push it over from 10 yards. 43 min: Benzema berates the linesman for putting up his flag just as the striker headed into the net. Naturally, Benzema will make just as ostentatious apology to the official when he realises that the decision was perfectly correct. 45 min: Marcelo's limping after being caught slyly by Toulalan. There's a stoppage while everyone expresses their sympathy. "Is it just me, or does Karim Benzema look like a shaven-headed Marcus Mumford?" neighs Oliver Hughes. I don't know who this Mumford man is: does he look like Benzema, anyone? Half-time: It's been a brilliant half, featuring a cracking goal, top saves and lots of slick and and inventive play. And it's still on a knife edge, as one goal for Lyon makes the sides level on aggregate. I reckon Puel will stick on Gomis soon to give his team a sturdier fulcrum up front and a more potent aerial threat, and shift Lisandro out to the left, from where he can be expected to do even more damage that Delgado has done in the first period. 46 min: As foreseen, Puel has decided not to dilly-dally and has made a change already and so Gomis is on in place of Briand. 47 min: Vibrant start to the half by Real, who have stretched Lyon with two dashing moves. On neither occasion did they get off a telling shot, however. 48 min: Ozil delivers a nice corner but Ronaldo narrowly fails to meet it at the near post. 50 min: Cissokho, who's been one of Lyon's best players so far, wins the ball in his own half and then gallops deep into Madrid territory. But fails to top that off with a decent cross. Lisandro, by the way, is now wide on the right following the introduction of Gomis. 52 min: Benzema and Ozil cut through Lyon with a rapid double one-two (shades of Cole and Yorke!) but Cris manages to block the German's shot from 14 yards. 55 min: Lloris makes a straight-forward save after Ramos heads at him following an Ozil corner. 56 min: It's been almost relentless Real Madrid pressure since half-time but Lyon have defended tenaciously and a little desperately. Ronaldo attempts to settle the game with a rocket from 40 yards. The game remains unsettled. 58 min: Ronaldo throws three lollipops and falls over. 60 min: Gomis incorrectly pulled back for offside following a fine dinked pass by Delgado ... but the striker didn't complain because his attempted finish was woeful. 63 min: That's a deft through-ball from Ronaldo to Benzema, who seems poised to shoot from 15 yards but then goes down under a challenge from Reveillere - but it was a fine challenge and the ref rightly waves away the Madrid protests. GOAL! Real 2-0 Lyon (Benzema 66') He's been excellent tonight and deserves that goal, which surely kills this tie. He was helped by the firstr really sloppy bit of Lyon defending of the night. Reveillere gave the ball in t he Madrid half, Marcelo clipped it quickly forward and Benzema got the jump on the dozing Cris and then slotted it under Lloris and into the net. 68 min: Lyon are being savaged now and Benzema came close to another. Following a dash down the right by Ozil and an inviting pass into the middle, Benzema bogged the ball just over from 16 yards. 71 min: A chance for a third Real goal is wasted as Di Maria errs with the final ball. 72 min: Dodgy goalkeeping by Casillas after Gomis and Lisandro swap quick passes the the former fires at goal from 20 yards. Casillas pushed it upwards and backwards and was relieved to see the ball drop behind for a corner rather than into the net. 75 min: It has been said often this season, not necessarily by wise people, that the one team whom Barcelona would struggle against is Stoke City. Well, we have just seen evidence that Real might indeed fall to pieces against the Potters, as a long Lyon throw-in just wrought havoc in their box. Real eventually scrambled the ball clear ... but would they have got away with that if Jon Walters had been on hand, eh? Eh? GOAL! Real 3-0 Lyon (Di Maria 76') That gorgeous finish ensures that Real will be in the Champions League quarter-finals for the first time in seven seasons. Ozil flicked a long ball on, Di Maria took it in his stride and then dinked it deliciously over the out-rushing Llorirs. 78 min: Adebayor is on now, sporting what Sky's down-with-the-kids commentator describes as a "wicked new hair-cut". It is possibly the first time that such a tidy, unremarkable coiffe has been described as "wicked". 80 min: Lyon change: Delgado off, Pjanic on, for all the good that'll do now. 82 min: Gomis has a decent ping from distance, and gain Casillas make more of a meal of it than necessary. It should have been a bread and butter save, he made it a spicy goulash. 84 min: Real substitution: Benzema off, Diarra on. Jose wants a clean sheet. 87 min: Like the drunk blokes on the boat in Jaws, Lyon are tired and they want to go home. 88 min: Unlike the drunk blokes on the boat in Jaws, Lyon will be delighted to see the fin (or la fin , if you prefer). Full-time: That was thoroughly deserved from Real. Lyon kept it tight for as long as they could but Real were too quick, too clever and too sharp. No one will want to play them in the next round. And on that note, goodbye.