Rick Edwards: two legs good

I'm not really working at the moment. I keep telling myself that this is fine; this is just how it is for a freelance TV presenter. Nevertheless, I am in a constant and unending state of unease and fear. So I've been trying to ward this off by occupying my mind. It doesn't really matter what with – I just need to stuff it with any old rubbish. It's either that or developing a prescription drug habit. Which scares me. Hence I've taken to playing a lot of backgammon against the computer. Relearning all the current world records in athletics. Designing a new kit for my football team. And, when they occur to me, setting myself banal little challenges.Such as this one: can I wear a different pair of trousers every day for a week? Easy, right? Wait until you hear the catch. Without wearing jeans. This is how I got on… Monday No problem. I'm partial to a chino trouser, and own several near-identical pairs. I pull out my slim beige Dockers and a denim shirt and I'm good to go (once I've put them on). So far, so easy. Tuesday I have an olive-green pair of twill pants made by Carhartt. They can be dressed up quite easily, so I wear them with a tucked-in white Oxford shirt, a nice brown leather belt and some brogue boots. Surely I will get offered a job if I'm waltzing around in this serious get-up*. Wednesday With all variations of chino/twill done, I select some cords. Burgundy cords. These are worryingly close to the sort of thing you might see on this excellent blog ( lookatmyfuckingredtrousers.blogspot.com ), so it's important not to team them with a rugger shirt. Luckily I don't own any rugger shirts. So I opt for a navy-blue crew-neck jumper and some white Superga trainers. Thursday A meeting to go to. This calls for a smart outfit. This also helps trouser-wise. I go for classic grey wool trousers, a light-blue shirt and navy-blue unstructured Cos blazer. Unfortunately I run late for the meeting and after an agonising tube journey arrive sweating profusely. This undoubtedly detracts from the outfit. There are no compliments. Friday I buy some new tweed trousers. They are dark green/black and woollen, and they make me feel like an adventurer. So much so that I venture out to the supermarket and do my weekly shop. Saturday I slouch about all day in my BJBs (Baggy Jogging Bottoms). I realise that this is cheating. I don't care. I am thrashing the computer at backgammon. Sunday I broke. I'm embarrassed to admit that my own stupid project defeated me. I wore my favourite Won Hundred jeans. And I loved it. * you'd think. But no.